Well, you guys. We’re three-eights of the way there. I bring you The Slap, Episode 3.
Last night’s episode focused on Anouk, the Uma Thurman character who works as a television show writer and is dating an actor, Jamie, who has a hipster haircut and also plays in a band.
This episode really only tangentially touched upon the slap, but also delved into a whole new storyline and Anouk’s past. Ultimately, the episode was kind of a week justification for Anouk’s feeling that the lawsuit surrounding the slap might tear the friend group apart.
So, the episode starts out by showing you what Anouk saw while the slap was going on: Hector holding hands with Connie under the deck.
As Anouk and Jamie leave the party, they talk about Hector and Connie, and Anouk playfully reminds Jamie that he’s not her boyfriend. She says she just wants to go home and work and that she’ll drop him off. Fast forward a couple of hours and Jamie has totally gone home with her, and they’ve totally had sex. She gets a late night call from Aisha and they make plans to go out and talk.
Anouk meets up with Aisha, and Rosie joins them. Rosie talks about how excited she is for the impending case, and how good it would be to put Harry away. Anouk says that Rosie should drop the case because it will scar the group of friends for life. Rosie says Anouk wouldn’t understand because Anouk doesn’t have kids.
Basically, this whole episode is a set up to remind you that women should totally just have kids and quit acting like they may not want them. Because all women are totally the same and designed completely for motherhood.
Anyway, Anouk leaves the friendly dinner in a huff and goes to see her mother, Virginia, who is played by Blythe Danner. Anouk tells Virginia that she’s worried about Hector cheating on Aisha because Aisha is her best friend. Virginia tells her she should confront Hector about it. Virginia also tells her to bring her boyfriend over for dinner.
Anouk goes to see Jamie’s band play, and she get sick. She’s been having all manner of mood swings and people comment about how she doesn’t look too good. So after the show, she buys some pregnancy tests. And yep, totes preggers.
Anouk brings Jamie to dinner with her mother, where her mother breaks the news to her in front of a group of people Anouk doesn’t know, that she has sold her apartment and will be moving to Edinburgh. Anouk flips out, and rightfully so.
Now the rest of the episode is a little fuzzy, because I started getting some texts from people, and Instagram was way more interesting. So just know that I’m going to convey the majority of what happened, but it may not be complete. Seriously, this show is wearing on me.
(I had a conversation with Chris about how I wouldn’t mind going back to rewatch bits of other shows, but I don’t want to do that with this one. It’s too much. Now, if it were an episode of Downton Abbey, I’d be on it. And I feel like I need to write an entire post about the time the Dowager said that Cora’s floral designs were best suited to a christening in southern Italy. WHAT THE HELL EVEN KIND OF INSULT IS THAT AND WHERE DO I LEARN TO MAKE SIMILAR ONES?!)
Jamie is a clever boy and figures out that his lady is pregnant. He’s excited and ready to settle down and wants to name the baby Olive or Oliver. Anouk breaks up with him because she can’t handle love. I guess. I don’t know. Maybe it’s the names he has chosen for the baby? I feel like whatever they tell me about these characters, it doesn’t make them seem real.
Anouk goes to Aisha and says she needs an abortion. Aisha, Anouk’s best friend, doesn’t seem to know her friend at all, or maybe knows her better than Anouk knows herself. Instead of referring her to a doctor immediately to perform the procedure, she tells Anouk to think about it. Aisha also tells Anouk that her son watches porn and she caught it because he didn’t clear the browser history. (This is unbelievable because incognito browsing has existed for the entirety of this kid’s life. He knows how the internet works. He wouldn’t let this happen.)
During this scene, Chris stated that it felt like the writers were just using buzzwords to convey emotions, and it kind of felt that way. Anouk says she doesn’t feel like she can be a mother. Aisha says no one is born knowing how to do it. We learn that while Anouk’s parents were going through their divorce, her father died. Anouk found paperwork that stated Virginia wanted Anouk’s father to have full custody. So we are left to infer that Anouk doesn’t feel like she can be a mom because her mom didn’t want her.
At some point Anouk goes to Hector and Aisha’s house while Aisha is at work so she can confront Hector. The kids are there. She throws them a toy. They chase after it like dogs. It felt weird to me though because Hector and Aisha’s son likes porn. So he’s probably in this really weird adolescent phase where he probably doesn’t want to be treated like a kid. I don’t know. I think maybe the writers aren’t familiar with kids. Because no kid is as demonic as Hugo, and no kids are as spoiled and childish as Hector’s. Rocco is a good depiction of a kid, but not a good depiction of a kid of a man with anger issues. Anyway…
Anouk goes to her mother’s house with a small gift to make amends, but her mother doesn’t appear immediately. So she goes to her mother’s computer and checks the browser history. Looks like Virginia had been researching some types of brain cancer. And that’s why she’s moving to Edinburgh–to undergo treatment for her brain tumor. Anouk leaves.
Anouk eventually comes back with a fancy pants Louis Vuitton suitcase for her mom. Virginia admits to knowing that Anouk is pregnant. In a later scene, Anouk gets back with Jamie. It looks like they’re going to have an Olive(r).
I had a lot of issues with this episode. Anouk is cool in that she’s not a typical representation of a woman we often see in primetime. Even the career-driven women are typically mothers. This isn’t necessarily an issue, but it would be cool to have a 40-year-old woman in a show who remains childless. Aisha can be the 40-year-old woman with children and the career.
Also, I don’t like how we’re given the impression that Jamie and Anouk are going to work things out and be the best parents ever. Even if it’s possible for them to be, Anouk didn’t enter that relationship with that as the endgame. Rather, she was basically just using him for sex (LIKE YOU DO IF YOU’RE A CHARACTER IN THE SLAP) and had no intentions of letting the relationship progress. Now, you can take the side of the argument that there is no such thing as “just sex” and it was bound to become something bigger. But Anouk seems to be a pretty high-ranking person with this TV show. And I would bet this ain’t her first “just sex” rodeo.
Another issue: Anouk becomes pregnant and doesn’t know it. SHE’S A 40-YEAR-OLD WOMAN WHO SEEMS TO BE COOL WITH CASUAL SEX. SHE KNOWS HOW TO PREVENT A PREGNANCY AND SHE WOULD BE IN TUNE ENOUGH WITH HER BODY TO KNOW SOMETHING WAS UP.
You guys. It’s getting harder to watch.
Next week it looks like we’re going to deal more with Hector’s father and the lawsuit. I’m pretty excited for an old Greek dude. I mean, season 2 of The Wire was my favorite season…
Episode 3 grade: YOU GET A GOLD STAR YOU SPECIAL SNOWFLAKE
I don’t even know anymore, you guys. This episode was a nice digression from the slap business. So, I liked that. But for an 8-episode series, can you have that much of a digression? Also, at this point in the series, I would really like more of a spotlight on Rosie and Gary than on Anouk.
I think watching this show each week is really validating my choice to not watch things as they air and to just binge watch on Netflix later. I hate waiting for more story, and when all I get is about something else, it makes me grumpy.